I cannot believe I just did that!  whomp.  I’m starting off a new year early, but off to a great start all the same.  I’m back in action?

One down, then another, and another.  Not stopping.  How did this happen to me?  When did it start?  What have I done?  When given time to think, there is no hope anywhere.  A failure in every way.  The last straw, an insignificant one.  Looking in the mirror at a grandiose mask, with nothing behind it.  Is it possible to be too intelligent and introspective for one’s own good?  Why should it progress with no prospects?  Where did it all go wrong?  These games people play, I don’t want to play.  I never have, and never said I wanted to.  But to leave me out would be impossible.  To recognize the selfless.  To wish there was an option to withdrawal and give to those that deserve an upper edge.  To know what is actually happening and why would make things too easy and require too much from others.  Maybe simply being around success gives the illusion of personal success.  All of which can disappear in a moment.  But in a time when survival of the fittest has no say, all must drudge on with no prevail.

ever have one of those times where you find out two people are dating and it’s just so horrible and predictable all at the same time that it makes you wanna throw up? yea, happening right now.

holy shit - my mind is gettin blown.  i cannot believe that just happened.  being creeped on, to the max. o.O

to those few people in your life who lead a solid life.  think of them often and be thankful to know them.

so ready to get out of here.  funny enough, hardly looking forward to going home either.  it’s going to be a long summer.  i’m feeling that i may just be finding my groove in the unknown for the time being.  feeling so creative and detail oriented lately, more than usual.  looking forward to home so i can have some free time to develop and evaluate.  i’d like to start some projects and accomplish a lot this summer.  i hope i find my path real soon because although it’s nice to have a sort of freedom, i don’t like not knowing exactly where i’m headed.  work out, learn, experience, talk, see, do, travel, buy, organize, evaluate and repeat.

All these sexy men just need to take a stand and come out of the closet already - they’re making everyone’s lives more difficult than they have to be.  I’m tired of all the hooligans. Unnecessary stress both ways.  It’d be nice to actually know for a fact who or what my options are for once.

A day, just like any other.  Drawn back however.  Recluse.  No games, no contact.  Calm.  Not worth anger, happiness or explanation.  Nothing describes.  Blank face, blank future.  Quiet hopeless passion.  Waiting for something to happen, or someone to come.  A scream for help?  You decide.  Silence is bliss.

stick your ground always.  every move you make, make it in confidence and with solid reason.  if you do that, you can do no wrong and no one can say otherwise.  you can be confident in your every move.  people all have different priorities, so it’s best to be weary of others.  have someone close to stick to, they’ll have your back and stand at your side.  but otherwise, you can do just fine on your own.  mind your own business, and the rest will come to you.  confidence is sexy and along with time and patience, will bring you all you need.  a supportive partner is not one to rely on, only one to help push you further along.  trust them completely, but don’t live through them.  you are the leader of your own life.  make it worth it.  lead the life you want.